Uncategorized

  • turned in my portfolio... that means i am done with all school-related shit until fall.  WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOhoo.


    i burned my typography crap onto a cd and brought it home so maybe i will post my first attempt at flash.  not right now though, i have to be at work in 30 minutes.


    i took a 4 hour nap today.  it was nice.


    heyyyyyyyyy maybe since it's summer and i dont have to tolerate school which i loathe so greatly, i will be less of a mental case!  we can only hope.


    who's taking me to star wars? :(

  • I AM DONE WITH SCHOOL!  finally.  well ok, i still have like another whole year but i am officially done until september.  i decided not to take that summer class because 1. i need a break from school entirely and 2. i probably wouldn't have passed it anyways because i am taking a week off and it's only a 4-week long session.  all i have left for this semester is finishing up a few drawings and putting them in my portfolio and turning that in for life drawing. 


    what else is good about taking a break from school is the fact that i can WORK more and actually make some money.  i might even be able to save up $400ish to buy a djembe from helen bond at PSG.  now THAT's something worth saving for. :D


    key west, t-minus 10 days.  i can't wait.  i hope my paycheck tomorrow is large enough to cover rent and still have like $100+ for the trip because, i only have $50 saved (and offically for PSG but i may tap into it).  and i don't get paid until the friday that we'll be IN key west for.  anyways.  i'm thinkin about hanging out with jimmy buffet, watching some transvestites shake their goove thangs, and watching the sun rise and set in the same day.  sounds like a vacation to me.  and THIS time i'll be over 21 and un-chaperoned, unlike my last key west visit.  party time.


    did you buy with teerth yet?

  • nin "with teeth" came out today.  buy it.  it's good.  i promise.


    the goddess may be playing match maker with me again.  on the way up to circle on sunday my sister and stephanie told me if i saw bright cloud and did not get his number, they were going to get it for me and then it would be 6th grade all over again.  luck had it that he was leaving just as we were arriving.  he was coming down the hill by the barn and we all waved and he waved back but then he kept going and i was like :( but!  there was a car in front of him that stopped for no reason at all, so he had to stop.  i went up to his window and i go "so i have to get your number," and he laughed and said "that's so smooth".  oh yeah, baby.  i am one smooth talkin mama.  anyways.  he's moving from appleton to madison in 2 weeks and who knows what may happen in that 2 weeks to my love life that is so extremely fucked up right now.  i don't know if i will call him before then or not... but i promised stephanie i would call her as soon as i did.


    steph gave me the green light to call her and bitch about my love life and whatever else as much as i want because her life is apparently boring... stuck at home with the baby.


    oh and speaking of babies... i am going to stick to cats for a while.  i value my sleep a lot. :D


    last week of class.  also known as hell week.  maybe nin will get me through it.

  • beltane at circle was beautiful, as usual.


    i was surprised how many people were happy to see me.  i'm used to going there and sort of hanging out with whoever i came with for the most part and maybe chatting with a few people but yesterday it was like every single person who i have ever met there was like "PERKY!!!!!!" and ran up to me and gave me big hugs.  it was nice.  a lot of people remembered me from being half of the may couple LAST Beltane but that's OK.  there was even one guy who is always there for holidays that came up to me and was like "So.  OK.  I see you at every single festival here and I still have no idea who you are! Hi I'm Brian!"  so i felt pretty popular yesterday, and that's always nice.  it was just the ego boost i needed, actually.  lol.  when in doubt, GO TO CIRCLE!  also one of the high points of the day was drum circle with nataraj and bright cloud.  (i think bright cloud may have a wee crush on me, and that is A-OK.  i met him at PSG last year and he is a fun guy (fungi)  and steph thinks he's gorgeous.  i can't say i don't agree.  he was crowned May King, afterall.)  anyways i have to start saving up for a drum from helen bond's collection.  they are the nicest, ever.  she brings them back from west africa where she studies african music and drum making.  i already swore to several people i wouldn't ever buy a drum from anyone else.  but they are in the $400 range for a djembe... worth it, however.


    anyways i am rambling about things that you people don't care about.


    going back to circle today to get mom's serving bowl she forgot.

  • today, i was on my way to class, and i came up on a slow school bus that was going probably 5 under the speed limit.  i think that this is OK since it is full of 2nd graders.  i get close enough to see the kids on the bus and for them to feel socially engaged with me, i suppose.  they start waving at me, and i wave back.  they are all :D and it makes me go :D this went on for a few miles until the road turned into 2 lanes and i passed them.  but it was a happy moment, being silly with the 7 year olds... i was very popular for a minute there.  i think that all of the back 4 rows were turned around beaming their kid smiles at me.  it brightened my day.  and these days have needed some brightening.


    feel free to send me flowers or some other material-something to make me feel better.  cash is good too.  don't send me an ecard, though, you lazy fucks.


    :D

  • took some new pics.  clicky.


       
     
       

  • i am so not emo.

  • ok so i am bitter.  that means you get to hear about it.  a lot of it, anyways.


    i hate bitches.  some of the women i work with at the garden center really have something stuck up their asses.  the co-owner, nancy, is OK, but sometimes she can be a little testy, and she's really the only person who has "jurisdiction" over me, so i can handle her not being/wanting to be my friend.  however, the employee heirarchy is well, nonexistant.  outside of  "owners" and "employees" there arent any people who have the title of "store manager" or even just "manager."  (they had a "store manager" for about 2 weeks and fired him) however, even in anarchy, structure will arise, and a few people who have been there the longest think that they have superiority.  well yeah, they sort of do.  they know the ropes better.  especially better than me, who just started a week ago.  however!  that does not give you the right to be a total bitch to a new employee and think that on their 4th day of working they should be able to do everything perfectly, without help, and know where everything is in the store, what it costs, what it's for and ET FUCKING CETERA.  plus there is one "bitch" in particular who is the queen of all who are bitches, thinks that she owns me, and yells at me when i am not just standing at the register waiting for a customer to come along (when there are 3 other people on registers) but actually going out and shadowing one of the NICER women who KNOWS what she's talking about, and trying to learn stuff.  this bitch actually had the audacity to tell me "not to leave the store" without her permission.  (some of the other, nicer employees and i had fun with the whole "alarm system" idea that every time i would step out into the greenhouse they would go "BEEP BEEP BEEP" so at least there was some comic relief.)  OH and then i hear today that i am "not talking to enough customers"  ok, bitches.  i greet every single person that walks through the doors.  ok so i didn't start roaming the store and asking people if they needed help until TODAY but that's because I DON'T KNOW where anything is.  i would end up walking up to them, they would go "yes um where's the ____" and chances are i wouldn't even know where/what it was.  BUT even if i did, they would probably want to know more about it, like "which kind of grass seed works the best in -some instance-" and i would just have to go get someone who knows what the hell they are talking about.  if i were a customer, i would probably get annoyed if someone asked if i needed help and then couldn't help me.  but i got pissed off enough that someone said that about me that i spent the rest of the day wandering around the store "helping" people, which ended up mostly being the scenario i just described.  and i hope i pissed some people off.  bitches make me bitchy.  so i bitch.  and then i light people on fire in my mind.  and sometimes flames shoot out of my eyes.  and sometimes people die.  i cant keep working 10 hour days on the weekends.  weekends are supposed to be for relaxing and socializing and casual sex... not imagining lighting people on fire with my eyeballs.


    i hate sluts. really no need for explanation here, the only people who like sluts are the ones who are trying to get something from them.  more often than not, i get more mad at the people who pay special attention to the sluts than the sluts themselves.  because, really, sluts are just depressed people who have it figured out.  they can't get attention if they do it any other way, so hey you know, whatever works.  every girl loves sexual attention, so you go get you some, you slutty slut.  here would be a good place to interject a "cum dumpsting" or a "gutter", though i prefer the former.  it's more creative.  HEY MAYBE I COULD BE A SLUT.  i think i will begin with an eating disorder!  what's the next step?  oh yes!  skanky clothes!  ok i got the look down now, i have the makeup and everything.  now i just need to work on the attitude.  any of you sluts have pointers?


    i hate boys.  though i do have a date with one of the "31s" on wednesday.  the one who looks like a record producer.  hey i found out he's a clothing designer, though.  so that's one point in the homosexual column.  he's not gay though, he has an "ex wife."  jesus am i already dating previously married men?  cougar?  i think you were the first.


    i hate life.  i keep telling myself all i have to do is get through this semester.  then will life be smooth sailing?  no, probably not.  but i guess i can only live deadline to deadline.  until i am dead.  line.  _______________________


     

  • I GOT A JOB! woot!  now i have two jobs and both of them are where my parents work.  i feel... so... mexican. (sorry if any of you reading this are mexican or just too PC for your own good--all i have to say in my defense is that stereotypes come from somewhere.  you don't have to be that place.  but someone is.) anyways here are my jobs.  because i have to tell you now.


    1.  father -- registrar's office and
    2. mother -- a garden center in my shitsplat town.  hooray! plants!


    it's about damn time, too.  i've been trying to get a part-time job since like, january.  i told the lady (nancy, one of the owners, who interviewed me today) that i wanted about 20 hours, more or less, and she took that to heart, and is probably gonna end up giving me something like 30.  i work tomorrow 9:45-4(6h15m) friday 4/15 7:45-6(yeeeouch 10h15m training day) and then saturday 7:45 to 2 (6h15m) so thats 22h45m in just 3 days.  i am gonna be RICH!  woohoo!  this is a good thing, folks.  because i owe a lot of money my parents and i am trying to save up for vacations that i did not think i could take because of money.  now i probably won't be able to take them because work won't let me off.  haha.  i better tell nancy tomorrow about my one week in june i have to take off for PSG (my mother told them the same thing and when they said 'but we don't take weeks off in june, that's the busiest month' mom gave her the look like 'don't make me quit this job over a week of vacation, you bitch' and she shut up.  lol.) i'm supposed to go to key west with my sister and some friends in may, new york city some time in the summer with tiff and kate on a very expensive 4(or 5 or whatever the highest is)-star hotel escape. and then there's PSG.  i already have my registration in for PSG (and i owe my mom $200 for it) so i'm not missing that, and that's good because honestly it's the most important of my "vacations" even though it's only mom and me. :D


    ok.  that's enough with the job crap. 


    i have been writing a lot of bad poetry lately.  maybe i will post some later.  if you're lucky.

  • BLAH